3. Best Friends (well partners in crime).

Week 6

By week 6 Sadie started to follow Nellie into the yard and sometimes into the garden which was a big thing for Sadie, but if I appeared, it was back in the house, creeping past me, then running. This only happened early mornings before neighbours and car noises were heard, ( we live in a very quiet village) still it was a bit of a move forward.   They dug🪏 lovely holes in the garden together (thank you! not). The only problem was as the weeks went on Nellie was learning fast, socialising, playing with the children etc. while Sadie wasn’t really moving forward much at all, she was frightened of the children and therefore growled even if softly at them (they are well behaved and very good with dogs), so she had to be kept in her pen when they visited. They had both learnt to sit and wait for a treat, (the dogs that is not the children).

Sadie had become braver with a bit of help from bold Nellie and would go to the bedroom door (dashing past the scary bathroom), she then discovered Bizzy's 'safe place' under my bed which Bizzy goes to every morning after she's been out for her walk/run and has done so for nearly nine years. So Sadie started to retreat to the bedroom and hide under the bed whenever she felt scared or needed to decompress over something hugely scary like me taking a book out of the bookcase. This was to become her ‘safe’ place. Its quite funny as we now have two guzunder’s (look it up).

Week 7. Little steps

I hated leaving Sadie behind when we all went out, it made me feel sad, seeing Nellie out and about and blooming while Sadie remained static and still very fearful of parts of the house and the garden. But as Jane said "Sadie doesnt know about ' the fun world outside' she's happy in her new safe little world".

Sadie was fine left in her pen at first and later she was happy to stay in the lounge with the pen door open when we went out, she was clean (always using the pads) and quietly waited for us coming back and was delighted to see us when we returned but she wouldn’t come into the kitchen: we had to go in the lounge to greet her.  Sadie is also clean at night and dashes out each morning to wee on the pee pads (she now never uses the pads in her pen) so did Nellie. Nellie had been quite clean initially but they copied one another and when one went the other did, so it was very hard with two dogs, I went through over 200 pads (we had so much rubbish we took it to the collection centre disguised as household rubbish!), in a seven week period ,and eventually we bought washables, which saved my life and sanity (well a bit of it).

Sadie did however learn to enjoy being brushed, she had become cuddlier with me and at last after 7 weeks, started to go to Jim😘, but only if he was sat down. 

By week 10 I was struggling to spend meaningful time with Sadie, as Nelly's presence made it difficult to bond or teach her new things. I couldn’t take her in the garden to learn things or just bond, she wouldn’t go out when we were there even with Nellie, we were lacking space to properly bond, as Nelly was always around and monopolised eithier Sadie or me.

Jane (a trustee, brilliant fosterer and good friend) kindly offered to take Nellie so I could focus on Sadie. I felt pulled in two directions, desperate for time and space with Sadie, but guilty for Nellie having to move yet again before adoption and she had done o well here. As Nellie was the intelligent one, with good coping strategies, and knowing what great and experienced fosterers Jane and Mike are, I accepted Jane’s kind offer, and Nellie went to Lincolnshire the following week. Nellie is still looking for her forever home.

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Pretty Nellie. Full of life. Partners in crime. Sadie in the garden with Nellie but not looking comfortable

Week 10 Missing Nelly

We did miss Nelly and all her funny ways, but oh it was so much calmer and peaceful for everyone including my Bizzie and Sammy, who I think were rather pleased she had gone. Sadie became so much calmer and a little bit more approachable. But you could see she missed her friend and often looked for her.   She still fears being approached so we allow her to come to us, she knows her name and does respond, now if I say aloud “where’s Sadie” she comes along to the lounge(from under the. bed), sometimes creeping or slowly other times running. Her tails wags most of the time when she’s with us, and Jim is fast becoming a friend; she still prefers him sat down, but she goes to him, and frequently hangs over the settee to reach him in his chair.  We keep a routine and she’s becoming a little more confident, plays lots with the toys (and chews them), still find socks (from where I know not).

The Role of Positive Reinforcement

Positive reinforcement plays a key role in Sadie's healing. she is under no pressure; She is rewarded for any brave behaviour. This includes:

• Taking a treat from a hand

• Moving closer to a person

• Making eye contact

• Having a cuddle

• Lots of praise

• Playing with her toys

Each reward was a building block in her confidence. I use high value treats, like small pieces of cooked chicken or cheese to motivate her gently to anything new.